Cruel and Unusual
by Calcitrix
Summary: Not a lot of drama just a fun piece about some punishment PT and some mild comedy of errors. Complete.
1. Chapter 1

Beach Head surveyed the group arranged before him. He tried not to smile enough to show through his balaclava, but boy did he have plans for them. When he couldn't sleep, he always spent the time thinking of new ways to torture the soldiers he was in charge of training. He had already made them run the obstacle course twice just to test out the "improvements" he and Stalker had implemented that week.

Now it was time for some hand-to-hand combat training. He would follow it up later with a few miles on the track. Beach Head didn't know what they had done to deserve the punishment PT and he didn't care. These Joes were his for five hours every day for a week.

He looked them over, trying to decide on sparring partners for the training. Shipwreck would be fairly evenly matched with Ace; Lady Jaye and Alpine were closest in size; Gung-Ho and Leatherneck were the other obvious pair. So of course Beach Head partnered them differently. They wouldn't learn anything fighting against someone with similar abilities and fighting styles.

"Shipwreck, you're with Gung-Ho. Ace, pair with Alpine. That leaves Jaye and Leatherneck." He made sure that each pair was far enough apart on the gym mats, and placed a selection of padded wooden training weapons next to each group, including staffs, escrima sticks, long knives, and batons. He watched as they each donned lightly padded footwear and gloves. That was one change that hadn't been his idea, but protests from Doc and Lifeline at the severity of injuries after a training match meant that they had to use them now.

"Listen up!" Beach Head barked. "Rules: use any weapon in the first round. No head shots. No groin shots. Don't break any bones." He looked at them. "The timer is set for ten minutes. After every round, you will discard your used weapons and choose new ones until in the last round you're left with just your fists and feet. I will judge winners for each match—losers run an extra four miles."

Lady Jaye, Shipwreck, and Alpine groaned. "Aw, Beach, after taking a beating from the Cajun you expect me to be able to run?" Shipwreck asked. Gung-Ho laughed.

Beach Head growled, "You should be able to run under any conditions. If you only ran when you were feeling good, what would be the point? We're supposed to simulate combat situations."

He stepped back and motioned for them to begin. He watched as the contestants dove for the weapons. Only Alpine held back, waiting for Ace to reach out for a staff before pushing him from behind. Unbalanced, Ace fell flat on the mat. Alpine did a little dance and said, "Okay, that was easy—who's next?" His glee turned to mock fear as Ace rose and swung the staff at his chest. "You're in for it now, man," Ace laughingly threatened.

Beach Head shook his head. They never took training seriously enough. Well, except Leatherneck. He understood what it was all about. After all, he had once been a drill instructor. The marine had opted for the two short escrima sticks and was swinging with a vengeance. Lady Jaye held a staff, trying vainly to ward off the blows from her energetic partner. It was impossible to block both sticks at once, though, and Beach Head winced as Leatherneck hit her on the leg. _That is gonna leave a bruise_, he thought. Of course, if they weren't black and blue from head to foot at the end of the day, he wasn't doing his job right.

Beach Head checked his watch. Four minutes left. Gung-Ho and Shipwreck were trading somewhat tame blows as neither of them felt the need to beat each other up that day. The drill sergeant called over to them, "If you two boys don't step up the pace you **both** run the extra miles!" He nodded to himself as they began to spar in earnest.

He blew a whistle to signal the end of the first round. Everyone stopped gratefully and discarded their "used" weapons. He started round two.

Gung-Ho and Shipwreck each grabbed an end of their staff and started a tug of war. Ace didn't move this time, and he and Alpine just stood there, each waiting for the other to reach down for a weapon first.

Leatherneck already held the heavy baton while Lady Jaye circled with the foam-padded wooden knife. She feinted a few times, keeping him back, but finally Leatherneck swung and connected solidly with her wrist, sending the practice knife flying. He moved in, and they traded blows for a moment before the hefty marine knocked her flat on her back. Leatherneck raised his weapon, but stopped mid-motion as Lady Jaye stared up at him. Beach Head looked closer to see what the problem was.

Ah. She was giving him the "look." Her eyes were lowered, lips slightly pursed. She looked hurt and vulnerable, but there was a glint of something else in her eyes; Beach Head knew it was ploy, and he hoped Leatherneck wouldn't fall for it. No such luck. The marine dropped his baton, muttering "sorry," and reached down a hand to help her up.

Lady Jaye flashed him a smile and grabbed his hand, then raised her foot, planted it in his stomach, and pulled. Leatherneck went sailing over her head to land in an ungraceful heap on the mat. She stood, casually dusting off her pants as Beach Head strode over.

Everyone else stopped to watch. Beach Head rounded on her, yelling, "That was a dirty trick!"

She raised her eyebrows at him. "What trick?" she asked.

"You know what I mean!" the drill sergeant replied. "That look. That wouldn't work in a real battle."

Lady Jaye continued to play innocent. "What look?"

Beach Head waved his hand around. "You know, the one where your eyes get all misty and googly and your lips get kinda pouty, and then you lower your eyelashes and look up and then you take a deep breath and…" he sputtered to a halt as the other men burst into laughter.

"Man, Beach," Shipwreck chortled. "Have you got a picture of it on your computer or something? Can I get a copy?"

He rounded on the sailor. "You know what I'm talking about! She knocked you on your ass last week by doing the same thing!"

Shipwreck sighed. "And I'd let her do it again and again…"

The drill sergeant turned to Leatherneck, who was sitting up now and watching the show. "I thought you of all people wouldn't fall for it…" He shook his head sadly.

Leatherneck shrugged. "Couldn't help it," he muttered.

Beach Head crossed his arms and turned his head toward the female Joe. "Stop it. You need to fight for real. Cobra soldiers aren't going to get all mushy when you look at them like that."

The corner of her mouth twitched. "And you do?"

He narrowed his eyes. "Mushy in a nauseated sort of way," he answered. "I'm serious. Ninety percent of the men you fight against are going to be bigger than you. You need to learn how to deal with that. I'm going to tell Duke to keep you in PT until I think your fighting skills are good enough."

"What!" she exploded. "Beach Head, that's not fair! I can hold my own and you know it!"

"Only because the guys hold back when they spar against you!" he yelled.

Her mouth dropped open. She turned to the others and asked, "Is that true? Do you?"

They shuffled their feet, embarrassed. "Uh, maybe a little," Gung-Ho finally responded.

"Hey, don't be mad," Alpine put in. "They know Joes like you and me have other, more important skills. No one expects us to be able to take down Storm Shadow single-handedly."

"What skills would those be?" Ace laughed.

"Laugh it up, flyboy," the climber responded. "Next time you crash a plane and get stuck on top of a cliff, I'll leave you there."

"Wait a minute," Lady Jaye interrupted. "Back to the subject at hand. Do you all really think I can't fight?"

Gung-Ho answered her. "It's not like that. Face off against any regular old greenshirt,certainly any Cobra soldier, and you'd tie him in knots. It's just, well… compared to some of the other Joes—I mean—" He gestured at Leatherneck. "You know what I mean."

"What about Cover Girl?" she asked. "She hardly ever even shows up for hand-to-hand combat training."

"So? She drives a tank," Shipwreck replied with a shrug.

Lady Jaye looked at Beach Head. "Fine. Talk to Duke. We'll see whether he agrees with you or not."

"I will," he replied. "And I think you're going to be seeing a lot of me over the next few weeks."

Lady Jaye rolled her eyes in response, and the sparring began again. She found it nearly impossible to put much effort into it, though—Leatherneck was hardly even swinging now, too embarrassed to look at her long enough to keep track of her moves, let alone aim his blows well.

She thought back, and realized that as often as she used the male Joes' innate protectiveness to turn mock-battles in her favor, she never really considered that she was doing anything wrong. Roadblock used his considerable size and reach against his sparring partners; why shouldn't she use her acting skills? That was her specialty, after all. And yet, what Beach Head said was true. Most Cobra troopers wouldn't let her get the upper hand because she gave them the "look." Well, some of them would, but not every time, and she would never know until it was too late. She had fought Cobra countless times and had never been beaten one-on-one, but…what about next time?

_That doesn't mean I want to spend a month or more with Beach Head every morning_, she thought. _There must be some way to avoid this_.

As expected, Beach Head announced that Lady Jaye, Alpine, and Shipwreck were the losers. That made six miles each of them had to run to the winners' two. As they trotted along the track, Lady Jaye pulled ahead of the men, hoping to finish earlier even if she would ache all the more tomorrow. She came up behind the group after lapping them the first time, and she heard Shipwreck say, "Fifty bucks on two months with violence instigated by Jaye." Ace nodded and said, "I'll have to come up with odds, of course, which may change as this drags on. Alpine?"

The climber answered, "Fifty on three months, no violence, Beach Head finally gives in to get rid of her."

"A hundred on one month, violence instigated by Beach." Gung-Ho put in.

Lady Jaye slowed, realizing the guys didn't know she could hear. They were already placing odds on the outcome of her extra PT! She was furious, and only partly because no one seemed to be betting that she would actually satisfy the drill sergeant and be legitimately released from his program. She pumped her legs and shot past the men, continuing to run almost full speed even after the three winners left the track after their two miles. She lapped the others a few more times and finished, walking for a while to stave off cramps. She headed to the locker room, brushing off Beach Head's praise that she seemed to be taking his advice seriously. That was certainly not why she had run so hard; she needed to work off the angry frustration before she could face anyone else on base.

Heading to lunch after a quick shower, she thought about the situation. She wanted neither to train with Beah Head for however long he decided it was necessary nor to give him the satisfaction of being right. Even if he was. She grabbed a tray and sat down, idly pushing her food around with her fork.

She was joined shortly by Flint, who sat next to her with a grin. "How was PT?" he asked.

She stuck her tongue out at him. "Next time you have to take the punishment," she replied.

He looked sheepish. "I said I was sorry," he mumbled. "I didn't mean to knock over the stack of chairs, and I didn't know Duke was in the hallway…"

She gave him a small smile. "Pick a better spot for a tryst next time, will you? It was bad enough Duke thought I was wandering around in the conference room by myself at night—if he had found you hiding under the table, he would have been really PO'd."

"Have I thanked you yet for taking the fall for us on that one?" He brushed his hand lightly over her leg under the table.

She blushed slightly, her smile widening. "As they say, actions speak louder than words. You're forgiven." She met his eyes, losing herself in the depth of emotion she saw there. She jumped as another tray clanged down on the table.

"Heya, doll, Wookie." Shepwreck sat down on Lady Jaye's other side, completely ignoring the glares his teammates threw his way.

"Wookie?" Flint asked, eyes narrowed.

Shipwreck waved a dismissive hand. "Easier than saying 'W-O."

Lady Jaye laughed, but bit her lips when Flint turned his glare on her. "You are hairy," she whispered with a giggle. "I'll get you for that," he whispered back.

Shipwreck was completely engrossed in his food, missing the short exchange. "Tell Flint yet about all the extra time you get to spend at the beach?"

She sighed. "Please just drop it," she said flatly.

"What?" Flint asked.

"Beach wants her in PT for the rest of her life," Shipwreck answered.

"Why? What did she do?" He gave her a questioning glance.

"Ah, you know Beach. He thinks she uses her looks and her cleavage too much to give her an edge in sparring. She threw Leatherneck today 'cause he fell for the 'damsel in distress' loo—OW!" He pulled his leg away to rub the spot where Lady Jaye had kicked him.

"Shut up," she hissed. She turned to Flint and scowled. "Beach Head thinks I can't fight."

Flint gave her a lopsided smile. "And I thought you only used that look on me." She elbowed him, and he chuckled, continuing, "Come on, Beach Head can't expect everyone to be Fight Club Champion of the World. Just because you need to use your considerable charms in training—"

"Need to?" Lady Jaye stood, grabbed her tray, and stormed off.

Shipwreck watched her leave, commenting, "I think we hurt her feelings."

Flint sighed. He had meant the comment only to tease; apparently Beach Head's assessment had affected her more than he thought. "It's not like she can't fight," he said.

"Heck, no," Shipwreck agreed. "But it's just that she's surrounded by a group of the toughest guys in the world. And Scarlett. No one but Beach Head expects her to be able to take Leatherneck or Snake Eyes in a match." He shrugged. "By the way, we've got a pool going…"


	2. Sarcasm falls on deaf ears

Lady Jaye didn't have the luxury of being able to return to her room to stew. She had to finish the paperwork from the last mission, which was likely to take the rest of the day. And after that, she had one more task to take care of.

Rising from the chair, she stretched and rolled her shoulders. She checked the clock. Still fairly early. He should still be up.

She made her way to the men's quarters, knocking softly on the door of the person she needed to talk to. He opened it immediately, and motioned her to enter.

She sat on his couch, declining his offer of refreshment. She took a deep breath. "Snake Eyes, I need your help."

He nodded for her to continue. "According to Beach Head, I'm not enough of a bad ass. He says my fighting skills suck, and he plans on keeping me in PT until I prove to him that I can hold my own against the other Joes."

Sitting on the other end of the couch, he signed, "You want me to train you?"

Lady Jaye gave him a pleading look. "If you can spare some extra time. The problem is, there's already a betting pool going around about how long it will take for Beach Head to give up, and…" she looked down. "And if he knows you're helping me, he'll think he was right all along."

Snake Eyes nodded, making the sign for 'secret.' He stood up and pulled her to her feet.

"You want to start now?" she asked, looking at the clock.

He shrugged.

"Yeah, why not?" she agreed with a sigh. She was exhausted, all of her muscles ached, and she had to be up early for her next punishment PT session. But she _had_ asked for his help.

They went to the gym, which was inevitably barren at this hour. No one worked out when they could be sleeping. Snake Eyes started the session by checking her stance and working her through a series of punches and kicks, gauging her abilities and style. After that he had her repeat them again and again, making small changes to her balance and the placement of her feet. They kept it up for over an hour, and she finally had to call it quits. Her arms and shoulders now hurt as much as her legs had from the six mile run.

"Thanks, Snake Eyes," she told him, wiping the sweat from her face. "Same place and time tomorrow?"

He nodded, and they left, each returning to their own quarters. Lady Jaye undressed and showered, not even bothering with the lights as she toweled off and flopped into bed.

"Oof! Hey, watch the elbow!" Flint sat up, rubbing his chest.

Lady Jaye jumped up, startled, then saw who it was. She laughed. "Sorry. I didn't see you. How did you get in?"

Flint grabbed her around the waist and pulled her close. "I have keys to everyone's room. I came here to wait for you, but when you didn't show up…" He nuzzled her bare shoulder, moving his hands down her unclothed form. "Mmmm…are you sure you didn't know I was here?"

She gasped as his lips traveled up her neck. "You have keys to everyone's room? Really?"

He chuckled. "In my office. Never know when I might need 'em." He gripped her hip, and she let out a sharp breath.

"Ouch. Bruise," she told him, moving his hand back to her waist. She kissed him, feeling some of the fatigue wash away.

"So… what took so long?" He asked, moving his arms around her back and massaging her sore muscles. His mouth continued to travel up and down her neck, making it hard for her to answer coherently.

"Mmmmm… that feels nice. I—oh!—had paperwork to do, then I went to—" she gasped—"work out for a little while."

Flint paused long enough to look in her eyes. They were weary, but held that special expression that they acquired whenever she looked at him. He loved to see it there, loved knowing he put it there. "You didn't take Beach Head too seriously, I hope? You know I was only teasing—"

She nipped his shoulder playfully. "I know. I was just still mad at him."

"But you went to work out…?"

"Can't hurt. Well, physically, yes—but you know what I mean." She moved her mouth over his skin, enjoying the feel of the muscles jumping in response under her lips.

"You can fight just fine—" he started.

She interrupted him with a kiss. "Don't want to talk about it right now…" she whispered. He obligingly changed the subject, murmuring softly in her ear, watching as a slow smile spread across her face.

The next morning's PT started off with a two mile run in full gear. Beach Head had also readied some weighted backpacks for them to wear. He had refused to alter them for each team members' size, and so while Leatherneck was carrying less than a third of his weight, Lady Jaye's pack was more than half her own. She gritted her teeth and jogged along, feeling the pressure in her knees almost from the start. By the time they had finished the first mile, she thought she was going to collapse. She kept running, though, feeling her leg muscles shake with the strain.

Although it took her longer, she did finish, if barely. She loosened the straps and dropped the pack, rubbing her sore muscles and trying to ignore Beach Head's rant about her time.

They moved to the obstacle course next; the wall wasn't too bad because she could use her arms, but she slowed nearly to a walk in between the other obstacles. Her legs gave out for a moment while she was slogging through the very cold, thigh-deep, muddy water, and she fell to her knees. She rose soaking and covered in slimy mud and trudged on.

The others looked on as she neared the end. They knew better than to help; Beach Head would simply make them start over again. Of course, he did anyway. Two more times, in fact.

It wasn't just Lady Jaye who was wiped at the end of that; all six of them looked much the worse for wear. Beach Head marched them all to the gym, not even letting them dry off before beginning combat practice.

Alpine was paired with Gung-Ho this time, Leatherneck fought Shipwreck, and Ace squared off against Lady Jaye.

"No weapons today, kiddies," Beach Head hollered. "Three rounds of fifteen minutes each. Today the losers aren't allowed to shower until after dinner."

Alpine opened his mouth to protest, saw the look on the drill sergeant's face, and changed his mind. The man did not understand the meaning of "fair," anyway.

Lady Jaye and Ace threw half-hearted punches and kicks at each other, and she noticed that even in her fatigued state, her blocks were more solid and her kicks had more force behind them because of her practice the night before. It wouldn't satisfy Beach Head, not by a long shot, but she was glad nonetheless.

"So, what are you in here for, anyway?" Ace asked her as they battled. "I mean, the rest of us were caught trying to sneak off base—what did you do to deserve this?"

She gave him a wry smile. "I'd rather not say." She blocked a kick and brought her own leg up in a roundhouse.

Ace ducked out of the way and threw a punch, which she mostly deflected. She was glad the pilot was as tired as he was; there wasn't a lot of strength behind the blows. "Oh, come on, you can't sidestep that easily," he protested.

"Yes, I can," she responded, managing to land a blow of her own.

"Get caught with Flint?" Ace asked as he threw another punch.

Startled, she didn't get the next block up in time, and staggered back as his fist connected solidy with her ribs. She bent over a moment to catch her breath. _He can't possibly know…_ she thought. _He's just fishing._

Ace grinned down at her. "Sorry. Did I hit a sore spot?"

Glaring up at him, she replied, "I did not get caught with Flint. And I don't like what you're implying."

He laughed as they resumed sparring. "Whatever. I've seen you two together a lot lately. It's natural to assume…"

Lady Jaye brought her foot up to his stomach, and he caught it, holding her. "I spend a lot of time with Beach Head, too—you don't think I'm seeing him romantically, do you?"

Still holding her foot, he waggled his eyebrows suggestively and replied, "Only if you're into S and M. But I think you're into W and O."

She wrenched her foot free and stepped up to try a throw. He ducked to the side and grabbed her from behind in a bear hug. "Admit it and I'll let you go," he told her.

"Not a chance," she growled, pulling against him.

"Come on. Say it." He loosed a hand to tickle her ribcage. "Say it."

She tried to elbow him, but her arms were pinned too tight. "Fine," she gasped. "Beach Head and I are having a torrid love affair, and the only reason I'm staying in PT is so that we can make out on the obstacle course."

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY!" Ace and Lady Jaye sprang apart as Beach Head's voice thundered from just behind them.

Face flaming bright red, Lady Jaye turned around to stare at the drill sergeant. Ace was doubled up, trying to suppress his mirth—unsuccessfully.

Shipwreck had actually fallen to the mat laughing like a madman; Alpine's shoulders were shaking, and Gung-Ho was slapping his thigh. Leatherneck was looking from Lady Jaye to Beach Head. He leaned down toward Shipwreck and asked, "Really? Talk about the odd couple."

"I was being sarcastic!" Lady Jaye yelled.

Beach Head stood, arms crossed, eyes mere slits as he stared at her. She noticed that what she could see of his face was as red as hers. She swallowed and looked at the floor.

Seconds passed, Shipwreck's wheezing the only sound to be heard in the room. Beach Head began to tap his foot, which was always a bad sign. His voice was low when he finally spoke. "I think twice more through the obstacle course might cool your ardour." When the others started laughing harder, he amended, "Make that three."

Shipwreck now looked like he was having an apoplexy. Leatherneck bent down to smack him on the back. Lady Jaye bit her lip to keep from saying anything that would only make the situation worse.

Beach Head continued to stare at her, telling the others they could leave early. He didn't forget to announce the winners and losers, of course—it would be several long hours before Shipwreck and Alpine would be able to wash the mud from themselves.

As they left, catcalling and laughing, Shipwreck called, "Have fun on the obstacle course, you two! Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

Lady Jaye continued to stand staring at her feet. Beach Head hadn't moved a muscle yet.

"Your blocks looked better today," he finally said.

She looked up, startled. "Uh, thanks."

"NOW MOVE YOUR BUTT TO THE OBSTACLE COURSE!" he screamed.

She winced, but started jogging back outside. He ran alongside her, keeping up a tirade of abuse, or as he would say, "motivation." It was no worse than usual, and she tuned most of it out. They reached the beginning of the course, and she trudged into place before the first challenge. At least she couldn't get any dirtier.

The runs were torturous, but she clenched her teeth and slogged through. They were easily her worst times yet, not that it came as a surprise. She had a continuous muscle spasm in her left calf and even her shoulders felt locked in place after the climbing, crawling, and swinging the course entailed. Fortunately her ears had become so plugged with mud after the first run that she could no longer hear Beach Head at all.

It was finally over, and the drill sergeant let her leave, reminding her she wasn't allowed to shower until after dinner. She fumed her way back to her room to at least change before lunch. She stood staring at her tub for a moment before giving in and starting the hot water running. After all, Beach Head had said nothing about a bath. Of course, she knew what he had meant, but she didn't care. What else could he do? She rinsed most of the mud from her hair in the sink, put on some music, and settled in for a long soak.


	3. Down and Dirty

By the time the bath water had begun to cool, Lady Jaye was feeling better, even if that still meant she ached with every movement. The heat had helped, and she seriously considered running another bath, but decided lunch was more important. As she walked into the mess hall, though, she realized it was a bad idea for several reasons.

Shipwreck burst into laughter the moment she walked near his table, commenting, "How did you _make out_ on the obstacle course?" She flipped him the finger and continued to the counter. Grabbing a sizeable portion of chili, she headed to the table where she could see Flint, Duke, and Scarlett sitting. She fell into a chair and started to eat, not wanting to interrupt what was obviously a business related discussion.

Duke finally looked over at her and said, "I'm sure you know that Beach Head asked for you to stay in PT…"

Lady Jaye nodded with a glower.

"I hate to say it, but Beach pretty much has free reign over assigning training in this case. Unless it's grossly unfair or he makes you work more than a couple of hours a day, I can't tell him not to keep you."

She sighed. "I'd argue with the 'grossly unfair' bit," she replied.

Her CO shrugged. "His assessment of training progress is what goes in the books, not mine."

Flint looked over at her. "Duke, you know her scores are as high as anyone else's. Beach Head is likely to keep her in PT for years… which you obviously wouldn't allow, so why not just nip it in the bud?"

"What do you have to do to get him to let you out?" Scarlett inquired.

Lady Jaye looked up with a scowl. "Beat him in hand-to-hand combat."

The redhead's mouth fell open in an 'O.' "Seriously? I think I could count on one hand the Joes who could do that." She turned to Duke. "That _is_ unfair."

"Beach Head only said she had to fight well enough to satisfy him, not that she had to beat him."

Flint commented, "That's kind of subjective, isn't it?"

"Nope," Duke replied. "Because he asked me to observe and be a second judge."

"What's the timeline, then?" Lady Jaye asked him.

"A match every week until we decide you're done."

"Starting?"

"One week after your first extra session, meaning one week after you're done with your punishment PT."

Scarlett smiled at her friend. "Hey, what did you do to get that sentence, anyway? You never said."

Lady Jaye stole a glance at Duke. "I got caught trying to set up a prank."

Duke's eyes gleamed in amusement. "You know, you never did explain to me how you expected to booby trap everyone's chairs without any supplies. You didn't even have a screwdriver to loosen the bolts."

Flint remained utterly silent through the exchange. He thought she'd done remarkably well coming up with a reason to be in the conference room in the middle of the night. It may have guaranteed a punishment, but it was believable.

"I was just checking it out, looking for inspiration."

"Sure. Okay." Duke chuckled.

Scarlett nudged Lady Jaye. "I get it. You were meeting someone, weren't you?"

Flint laughed. "She pegged you, Jaye. Who was it?"

She wished she was close enough to kick him without being obvious about it. "Very funny. There's absolutely no one on base I'd consider sleeping with _right now_." She shot Flint a glare.

"I heard something about you and Beach Head today that says otherwise," he replied with a wink.

Scarlett choked on her coffee. "Beach Head?" she gasped.

Duke frowned at them. "That's a very, very disturbing image," he said. "And based on the language he used while talking about you, very hard to believe."

Lady Jaye smiled. "What? He's a good-looking guy."

Flint's smile was starting to slip. "Maybe we could change the subject," he said.

"Oh, no," Scarlett said. "This is juicy. Spill it, Jaye. Is there something going on?"

"I'm _right here_!" Duke said loudly. "I can hear you, you know. CO, and all that."

Scarlett laughed. "Would you really care if they were getting down and dirty in the mud pit?" she asked him.

He wrinkled his nose. "Professionally… well, not really. I mean, it's not like we're as uptight as other units as far as regs go. I've always taken the stance that if it doesn't affect your performance, I don't need to worry about it. Personally, though… I find the whole idea very disconcerting."

Flint gave Lady Jaye a wry smile. Maybe he had hid under the table for no good reason. Which meant that this whole issue with Beach Head didn't have to happen.

Lady Jaye rolled her eyes in response and lifted her shoulders in a shrug. She finished her chili and refilled her coffee cup from the carafe on the table. She saw the drill sergeant himself enter the room, and he squinted at her from the doorway.

Beach Head made his way to her chair and looked her over. He bent down and put his nose in her hair.

"You smell good," he growled.

Scarlett bit her lips and let out a snort. Duke's eyes flew open, and his jaw dropped. Even Flint looked taken aback.

"You should have waited like I told you to before taking a shower," Beach Head continued. "Now I'm just going to have to get you all nice and muddy again. Meet me in an hour in my office," he told her, walking away.

"Oh…my…God…" Scarlett whispered. "It's true!"

"No!" Lady Jaye waved her hands frantically. "That wasn't what it sounded like!"

Duke stood, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. "Just don't tell me any details," he said, walking away. Scarlett stood, too, grabbing the empty cups and coffee carafe. "I've gotta go… do… something," she stammered as an excuse to leave. She only made it as far as the table where Cover Girl sat, though. _Oh, boy. If there weren't rumors before, there sure will be now,_ she thought.

Lady Jaye put her head down on the table. "Unbelievable," she muttered.

"Yeah. Unbelievable," Flint said. "What was that about?" There was a hard edge to his voice.

She looked up, incredulous. "Don't tell me you would actually think--?"

He scowled. "He said you smelled nice."

She sighed. "Shipwreck, Alpine, and I lost the sparring matches today—we weren't supposed to shower until after dinner."

Flint considered her for a moment. "That's it? He was checking to see if you washed your hair?" She nodded. "Hunh. He sounded pretty eager to get you into his office." He looked down at his cup. "And you said he was good-looking…" he mumbled.

"Flint, he always sounds eager when he's got someone to torture. I'm sure I get to run the obstacle course. For the seventh time today." She leaned in and whispered, "He's not nearly as handsome as a certain Warrant Officer I might name…"

He looked up with a smile. "Who? Torpedo?"

"Mmmmm… I do like them dark-haired. You're off by thirty pounds and a beret, though."

"If you didn't have to be in PT again in 45 minutes…" he said, looking her over with a grin. "Oh, well. You'll need to shower later, then, won't you?"

She felt her heart flutter. "Yep. And after that I was thinking of a visit to the hot tub to soothe my aching muscles…which will be aching even more by then if the look in your eye is anything to go by…"

He stood and helped her up. "Well at least my idea of a work-out is pleasant."

She laughed. "Just don't expect me to be able to stand without support." She felt his hand tighten on hers, felt the pulse racing in his wrist.

He leaned close and murmured in her ear, voice husky, "I think I can handle that."

Lady Jaye returned to her room and changed back into her dirty BDUs. They were still cold and clammy, but there was no point in wearing fresh ones. She tried a few stretches, trying to loosen the kinks that were forming in her arms and legs.

She made it to Beach Head's office early enough not to give him something else to complain about, and he simply gestured at her to follow him outside. She was surprised when he didn't head to the beginning of the obstacle course, but instead to the middle. He walked right into the mud pit at the center of the course and stood there looking at her. "Well?" He finally growled. "Get in."

She stared at him a moment longer, then with a sigh, jumped off the bank and immediately sank to her knees in mud. The simple act of walking to the middle of the pit made her thighs scream in protest. "So you don't want me to run the course? I'll happily roll around in the mud for a few minutes if all you want is for me to get filthy again."

Beach Head answered by throwing a punch at her head. She ducked and tripped, landing on her knees, splattering mud everywhere. The drill sergeant didn't let up, though. He hauled her to her feet and turned the movement into a throw. Lady Jaye landed in a roll—or at least tried to. She mostly just ended up diving face first into the muck. She rose, sputtering, as Beach Head kicked her in the back, sending her right back under.

She stood, wiped the mud from her eyes, and turned around. So, this was going to be a little extra "sparring practice," was it? She fell into a defensive crouch and waited for the next attack. He lifted a foot toward her face, and she moved in close enough so that the blow lost its power, aiming a fist at his chest. Beach Head simply continued his original movement, which took him out of the way and landed him behind her. She instinctively ducked again and heard his arm whistle over her head.

Lady Jaye kicked straight back and up and managed to land a blow on her instructor's ribs. He didn't falter, merely backed out of her foot's main force, grabbed her leg at the knee, and heaved upwards. She toppled completely over and struggled upright again, spitting mud out of her mouth this time. She was getting really pissed.

Beach Head blocked her first two punches, but she refused to let him get back on the offensive. Her aches forgotten, she attempted to pummel, kick, and throw him for several minutes. Although a few punches and two good kicks landed, the drill instructor barely even grunted at the impacts. Lady Jaye's muscles finally started shaking, and she had to stand back to give them a moment to recover.

He wasn't about to give her the opportunity, though. He started a barrage of his own that had her abused muscles straining to keep up. Her blocks missed the mark about half the time, but she thought that considering what she had been through that day, he could hardly complain. Then again, this was Beach Head. "What was that weak attempt at a block? That block wouldn't have stopped a punch thrown by Duke's granny. Was that a kick or a muscle spasm? Oh, I'm sorry, did you duck or did your knees buckle?"

It infuriated her that he had enough breath to spare to keep up the banter through the entire round of blows. Her own breath was coming ragged, and she couldn't manage the return insults she normally prided herself for. It made her even angrier that other than his legs, Beach Head's uniform showed only a few spatters of mud, while her own wasn't even recognizable any more.

How long it lasted, she didn't know. An hour? More? Finally she gave a last punch and ended up falling forward after it, as her legs finally gave in. Surprised, Beach Head caught her as she stumbled against his chest. He pulled her face up so that their eyes met. "If a day of training wears you out this much, you have to admit I was right," he glowered. She stared back up at him defiantly, although the effect was somewhat ruined by the fact that she needed his support simply to remain standing.

Of course it was at that moment that Cover Girl and Scarlett drew near the obstacle course on their afternoon run around the track. Their heads swiveled around to watch as they jogged by. Scarlett let out a hoot of laughter and Cover Girl gave one of her ear-splitting whistles.

Beach Head let go of Lady Jaye so fast that she fell right into the mud again. She didn't feel like getting back up. _Just let me drown in the mud,_ she prayed. Beach Head grabbed the back of her shirt and hauled her to her feet, then over to the lip of the mud pit. He shoved her up over the edge and climbed out. When she made no move to get up, he squatted by her head and rolled her over. He wasn't smiling. "Admit I'm right," he demanded.

Lady Jaye cracked open an eye and regarded him warily. She opened her mouth to reply, and the mud on her lips slid right in. She sat up to spit and cough, and when she looked up again, Beach Head was walking back to the buildings. She stood as the two other women came around the track again. It took her a moment to realize that they were not singing a regulation cadence as they ran.

"Beach has a girl and her name is Jaye," Cover Girl sang, Scarlett replying with the echo, "Gets her real dirty every single day." They were too far away to see her scowl, not that they could under the mud, anyway. "Starts her at seven and ends at six…"

"DON'T YOU DARE FINISH THAT RHYME!" Lady Jaye hollered. Her two friends giggled in response as they rounded the track.

She trudged wearily back to her room. It was still several hours until dinner, but she just couldn't care. She would have to give Flint a raincheck on the shower. For the second time that day, she stripped and washed the slippery mud from herself. She would simply stay in her room until after dinner. She was fairly certain Beach Head wouldn't bother her there. Just in case, though, she locked the door and turned on the T.V.

Her isolation lasted about an hour. She tried to ignore the knocks, but as soon as Beach Head's extremely loud voice replaced the rapping, she knew she was in trouble. "Open this door right now, Corporal! If you're mad about the fight, I'm not going to apologize! You deserved it, and you know it!"

She sighed and opened the door. He stood there glowering in his muddy BDUs, arms crossed, looking very angry. Lady Jaye saw movement out of the corner of her eye and noticed Shipwreck peeking around the corner. _Wonderful_, she fumed. _Now everyone is going to think we had a lover's spat._

Imitating his pose, she simply waited for the rest of the outburst. Instead he eyed her up and down, eyes narrowing as he saw her groomed appearance. "Damn. Do you **want** me to roll you around in the mud again?"

She sighed. "Did it ever occur to you that some of us have other work to do today? I can't exactly manage my paperwork coated in three inches of mud."

He harrumphed. "I'd buy that if I knew you had paperwork to do today. I'm not going to be nice to you in PT just because you're a girl. Get over it."

"Look, Beach Head. You made your point. I'm tired and extremely sore. Will you just let it go?"

He stood silent a moment. She knew he was posturing, being the alpha male; maybe if she showed enough throat he would leave her alone. For today, anyway. She looked down at the ground and sighed, letting her shoulders slump.

Beach Head actually gave in. She managed not to smile when he simply told her to be sure to show up at PT the next morning. _So you don't fall for my tricks, huh?_ She asked him silently. _Yeah, right. _She watched him walk away and started to shut the door again.

Shipwreck threw his arms through her door before she managed to close it. He was still filthy, of course. "So, your boyfriend let you take a shower, huh?" he asked her with a wink.

She rolled her eyes. "Why don't you ask him out and maybe he'll let you off easy," she growled. "For the last time, Shipwreck, we are not dating." She grabbed the front of his muddy shirt. "Can you really see me kissing Beach Head? Really?"

He looked down at her with a glint in his eye. "Not when you've got me right in front of you, babe," he drawled, leaning closer.

She pushed him back into the hall and slammed her door.


	4. Worse and Worse

She slept until dinner, feeling a little bit better when she awoke. At least until she tried to get out of bed. Lady Jaye rarely felt this done in from a workout, but she knew that a run with full gear followed by several repetitions of the obstacle course and two combat training matches could do that to anyone. She moaned and tried to walk without limping to the mess hall.

Everyone raised their heads and watched her when she walked in. _Jeez, has anyone not heard the rumors?_ She wondered. She ignored her teammates' stares and filled her tray with food. She turned and scanned the room. Flint wasn't there, but Beach Head was. The drill sergeant was eating with his head barely above his plate; it was obvious he was trying not to look at anyone else in the room. _So he's even more embarrassed than I am,_ she mused. A wicked grin spread across her face as she moved toward his table. She might pay for it tomorrow, but it was too good an opportunity to miss.

She sat down right next to Beach Head, and it took him a moment to wonder why the room had gone silent. Finally he looked up and noticed her sitting there. He ducked his head back down immediately and tried to ignore her. Unfortunately he couldn't ignore Shipweck's stage whisper from the next table. "Aw, ain't they cute?"

A few snickers followed this remark from various seats in the room. Lady Jaye swore she saw Beach Head's face turn red. She grinned and leaned closer. "It's your fault, you know," she whispered. "Learn the meaning of the word 'innuendo' and avoid it at all costs."

His head shot up, and he nearly shouted, "You were the one who told Ace that we're lovers!" Realizing what he just said, Beach Head looked around wildly and yelled, "But we're not! I didn't mean—that is—" His voice was drowned out by the hoots and laughter of their teammates. He stood, leaving his tray on the table, and screamed, "The next person who makes one comment about me and Jaye is going to be in for it!" He shook his fist for emphasis, and Shipwreck nearly rolled out of his chair, gasping for breath. Beach Head stormed from the room, ignoring the many comments made as he passed the other tables.

Lady Jaye simply sat quietly and ate her meal. _That was way too easy_, she thought_ . I should tell Duke that Beach Head needs to sit through hours of cover ops training so that he learns how to keep his mouth shut, or at least to say what he means. _

She looked up at Cover Girl and Scarlett as the women joined her at the table. "Okay, we were totally kidding before… I guess we thought it would never happen. But, you know, it's okay, I mean, everyone has their own, um, preferences. We're uh, really happy for you," Cover Girl began.

"Yeah, so how long has this been going on?" Scarlett asked. "Give us all the smelly—I mean, juicy details."

Lady Jaye rolled her eyes. "There are no details. Beach Head and I are not an item," she replied.

"Uh-huh. That's not what it looked like in the mud pit today." Scarlett lifted her eyebrows. "In fact, it looked like you were standing there in each other's arms, and if he wasn't wearing that stupid mask, I would have said he was about to kiss you."

"Would you believe I had just collapsed from fatigue after Beach spent an hour pummeling me?" Lady Jaye asked her.

"Oh, so that's what they call it nowadays," Cover Girl laughed.

Lady Jaye punched her on the shoulder. "Seriously. I'm black and blue. Want to see the bruises?"

Scarlett held up her hands. "No, thanks. Come on, Jaye—the man smelled your hair this morning."

She simply shook her head. "You're both wrong. Beach Head has it in for me, and I mean in a bad way."

"Yeah, he's got it bad," Cover Girl quipped. "I thought we were your best friends. Come on, what's he like? Is he a good kisser at least?"

"I wouldn't know," Lady Jaye said forcefully. "I have never kissed him. Really. There's nothing going on." Her plan was definitely backfiring.

"Okay. Well, when you decide to tell us about it, you know where to find us," Scarlett told her. The two women stood and walked off, but were quickly replaced by Ace, Shipwreck, and Alpine.

"Man, Jaye, I thought you were kidding," Ace said. "What the Hell do you see in that guy?"

Lady Jaye took a deep breath. "For the last time, there is absolutely nothing going on between me and Beach Head. Of everyone on base, he would be the penultimate man I would sleep with."

"Wow, she really likes him," Shipwreck said.

"That means second to last, moron," she replied.

"Oh, really. The last being…?"

"You."

"Oh, she wounds me!" Shipwreck clutched his heart. "Well," he said with a wink, "If he ever dumps you, you know where to find me!"

Completely oblivious, Shipwreck stood, turned to the next table, and declared, "She says Beach is the ultimate in bed! Can you believe it? Never thought he had it in him!"

Lady Jaye banged her head repeatedly on the table in time to the applause of the others.

Alpine clapped her on the shoulder and said, "Each to her own. Don't let us keep you from the mud pit." He rose and went back to his table.

Only Ace remained quiet. He looked at her for a minute and said, "This is a cover up, isn't it? I just don't understand why you'd rather have everyone think you're sleeping with Beach Head instead of Flint…"

"I'm not sleeping with Beach Head!" she growled.

Ace grinned. "Gotcha. So you **are** sleeping with Flint."

She opened and closed her mouth a few times. "I never said that, either."

He laughed. "No, you never did." He shrugged. "Didn't deny it, though."

She rested her chin in her hands and sighed. "Don't say anything, okay? I've got enough to deal with right now." She gestured at the others.

His mouth dropped open. "You ARE? Aw, man. I was just fishing the other morning." He narrowed his eyes at her. "Unless that's a ruse, too. Damn. Now I don't know what to believe."

She just smiled mysteriously and took the last few bites of her dinner.

Ace shook his head and rejoined his teammates at the other table_. This is getting ridiculous,_ she thought. _I can't believe they'd think we would—_she couldn't finish the thought.

She managed to catch up with Flint in his room a short while later, and she recounted her day, knowing that he was likely to hear about it sooner or later. He found the situation pretty funny, at least after she took some time convincing him she wasn't interested in anyone else.

"Sorry I didn't wait for you on the shower," she finished. "I had to scrape the mud off with a towel first so that I wouldn't plug the drain."

She was in his lap on his couch, and at this statement, he leaned in to kiss her neck. "I would have liked to help…"

She laughed. "You were in a meeting. I doubt Duke would have appreciated me interrupting to ask if you could come take a shower with me."

"It wasn't a very important meeting," he replied with a shrug. "Besides, it's unfair that your other boyfriend gets to see you all covered in mud and I don't."

She smacked him on the chest. "Well, we could still hit the hot tub," she suggested.

He grinned in reply and helped her to her feet. He watched in amusement as she winced at every movement. "Do you need me to carry you?"

She looked up with a wry grin. "If this keeps up, I'm going to need a wheelchair."

Lady Jaye hobbled back to her room, leaving Flint to change into his bathing suit while she did the same. She looked down at the bruises now exposed by her suit and sighed. Oh, well. She wasn't entering a beauty contest. She checked the clock on the way out—still a couple of hours before she was supposed to meet Snake Eyes. She hoped that the hot water would at least ease her muscles enough to let her work out with him at least a little while. It's not like she would be feeling any better in the nights to come the way things were shaping up; she might as well get used to it.

She walked through the pool room and toward the separate sauna and hot tub area. It was a popular spot on base, of course, and was usually occupied by at least a couple of people in the evenings. It was also gossip central, as the Joes returning from missions often relaxed there, catching up on recent events.

Shipwreck's voice could be heard coming from the open doorway, filling in some recent returnee on the new romantic development on base. When she heard the resultant laughter, she had to groan. Clutch was back. If anyone could make the situation more uncomfortable, he could.

He started the moment she walked in. Clutch looked her over, noting the various black and blue patches of skin. "Always figured you'd like it rough," he laughed. Flint was seated across from Cutch, and looked like he wanted to kick the man. Lady Jaye slid in the water to sit next to Flint, sighing in pleasure at the temperature.

She smiled sweetly at Clutch. "As usual, Shipwreck has his head up his ass. It's not surprising that yours is joining him there."

He hardly missed a beat. "Speaking of which, does Beachie like to give it to you up the—urk!" He stopped when he felt Lady Jaye's foot threateningly placed between his legs.

"What was that?" She asked.

"Uh, I was wondering if your boyfriend likes to give, ah, back massages?" He replied with a nervous grin.

Lady Jaye removed her foot. "Well, no, but that sounds like a good suggestion." Normally she wouldn't resort to brute force, but her brain was too tired to think of any cutting remarks.

"Speaking of your boyfriend, though," Flint said, "I wonder what you see in him." He gave her a lopsided grin.

She smiled back and said, "Well...He is extraordinarily handsome. He's smart, too. And he has a pretty good sense of humor, to boot."

Shipwreck's mouth fell open. "Beach Head? Smart and funny?"

"I'm not talking about Beach Head," Lady Jaye told him.

He just waved off her comment. "Yeah, whatever." He nudged Clutch. "Can you imagine the kids? Do you think they'd wear little balaclavas?"

Lady Jaye felt Flint's hand grasp hers under the concealing foam. She gave him a squeeze and leaned back in the tub, trying to ignore the chatter around her. She jumped when Flint's hand brushed against her leg. She left her eyes closed and concentrated on the feel of the jets on her back and the warmth seeping into her skin.

Shipwreck and Clutch finally gave up grilling her when she refused to answer any other questions, and they left after a few minutes. Flint sidled closer to her as soon as they walked out the door and pulled her in for a quick kiss. She sighed against him, letting herself relax in his embrace. Later she'd have to meet Snake Eyes for what was sure to be a torturous round of practice, but for now she could forget everything else.


	5. It Backfires

Snake Eyes took it easy on Lady Jaye that night, simply having her repeat various movements over and over, concentrating on foot placement and balance. He seemed to intuitively know what she needed to practice to make her fighting stronger. He was a very patient teacher, and she wished that Beach Head would take some pointers from Snake Eyes—browbeating and insulting students only got them so far. Not that the drill instructor was like that all of the time; she'd learned a lot from previous training sessions. But Snake Eyes made small corrections and suggestions that had her suddenly feeling the power behind the movements and understanding the balance involved.

She asked him about it, and he explained a little about how to generate power from the center of the chest rather than in the arms and legs; that if the body was in balance, everything else fell into place. She could feel it start to click; it didn't even hurt as much to move when she managed to fix her attention the way Snake Eyes suggested.

They finished up with a short exercise. The two of them knelt facing each other, and Snake Eyes held her wrists so that she could move but not break free. She was supposed to try to pull or push him over, but no matter how she moved her arms, he diverted the force or used her own momentum against her. They switched after a few minutes, and Lady Jaye grabbed his wrists. Snake Eyes immediately put his hands together and pushed, sending her right over on her back.

"How do you do that?" She asked, amazed.

_It's all balance_. he replied in sign language. He gestured for her to continue, and showed her how easily he could push her to the side or pull her forward, and she could see that it _was_ all balance; he was obviously using very little strength, but the movements didn't seem to require any.

Finally he stood and pulled her up_. Anyone can beat a stronger opponent. You just need to be centered. Find your balance. _he told her. She nodded and thanked him, and they agreed to meet yet again the next night.

She fell asleep immediately after Flint left that night and was almost late to PT the next morning. Apparently the others had already been ribbing Beach Head about her, because he looked angrier than usual. _Dummies_, she fumed. _Like PT's not bad enough already_. She pushed away a small twinge of guilt that said that she hadn't helped much the day before, either.

"Alright!" he barked. "Change of pace! We're gonna start with hand-to-hand practice today in two teams. You'll fight two on one, changing attackers and defenders after each round." He glared at them, daring them to protest, but even Shipwreck was quiet. "Shipwreck, Gung-Ho, and Lady Jaye will work together, leaving Alpine, Ace, and Leatherneck for the other group. Jaye and Ace are the first two defenders. Rounds are twenty minutes." He glared at them for a moment. "By the way, if I don't think you're giving it your all, the rest of the morning is going to be Hell."

They separated themselves on the mats and at Beach Head's signal began to spar. Gung Ho came at Lady Jaye immediately, swinging a huge fist at her head. She stepped back, and as his momentum carried him toward her, she grabbed his wrist and yanked hard. The marine fell forward, off balance, but caught himself, rolling out of the way. Shipwreck had moved in from the other side, punching at her stomach. Her block was solid, and she put a hand behind his shoulder and pushed. He, too fell over, and Lady Jaye found herself smiling. She hadn't lost the feeling from practice the night before; it was balance, and the way Snake Eyes had showed her to move made sense.

Gung Ho tackled her at the knees, and the fight went downhill from there. Once she lost her sense of balance, it was hard to get back on track. She managed to acquit herself fairly well, considering that she was facing off against two large men whose fighting style ran to brawling, and by the time the first round was over, she had scored a few good hits. Of course, she had taken some, too, but she was still standing.

Beach Head blew the whistle and walked around the other threesome, commenting on certain moves and offering suggestions. When he turned to Lady Jaye his eyes got a shade darker and narrower. "You guys were going easy on her, weren't you?" he demanded.

Shipwreck held up his hands. "No way. I was 'giving it my all.' Really. Don't make me run laps!"

Gung Ho agreed. "Yeah, Beach Head. I didn't pull my punches at all."

The drill sergeant faced Lady Jaye. "I've seen worse. Guess spending all this extra time in PT is paying off, huh?"

She scowled at him. "Oh, right. Running through that insane obstacle course over and over really helps."

"You said the magic words," he replied with an evil grin. "But I'm saving that for later. Switch defenders. Shipwreck and Alpine, you're up."

Lady Jaye concentrated on feeling where her feet were as she fought the sailor. She found that small adjustments made her feel more solidly anchored, and that she had more force in her throws. It made her think that everyone should train with Snake Eyes for a while and skip the ropes and mud pit.

After an hour they were done and headed out to the obstacle course. Beach Head opened a large wooden box that had been placed at the starting line, and withdrew six pairs of goggles, which he handed around.

"What the heck are these for?" Ace asked.

"Just put 'em on," Beach Head replied.

They started the run side by side, and as they climbed the first wall, Lady Jaye heard a loud pop and felt a sharp sting on her back. She glanced over her shoulder and saw Beach Head take aim again with the gun. The next shot splattered on the wall beside her, leaving a circle of yellow paint. Apparently the drill sergeant hadn't thought his course was insane enough.

The constant barrage of paintball fire made the run a lot more difficult than usual. After they had each been hit a few times, they tended to duck skittishly at every crack of the gun. Walking along the high beam was the worst. They had to take it one at a time, leaving Beach Head ample time to aim and fire. He grinned wickedly as he shot at each of them in turn. Only Alpine made it across, his sense of balance being much more developed than the others.'

Beach Head made it a point to fire at Lady Jaye the most, but he scored several good hits on the others as well. The group shifted nervously at the finish point as they watched the drill instructor refill the gun's hopper with paintballs. He ordered them to turn around and start the course again; the evil glint in his eye made them all wince. Those paintballs hurt!

Unfortunately they still had a three mile run to do to finish up that day's PT, and Beach Head took the paintball gun along with him. As they walked to the track, Lady Jaye heard him chortle, "I should have thought of this a long time ago."

He sat in a lawn chair in the center of the track, taking the occasional pot-shot at one of the Joes. Seen from outside, it was probably hysterically funny to watch. They ran in fits and bursts, ducking and weaving from one side of the track to the other. It attracted a small crowd, and Beach Head passed the gun around, letting Clutch, Cover Girl, and Steeler fire off a few rounds. Lady Jaye didn't see it, but she was sure it was Clutch who shot her in the butt several times. The four Joes in the center green were laughing riotously, slapping Beach Head on the back in a congratulatory gesture for a fine addition to punishment PT.

They finally ran out of paintballs somewhere around the end of the second mile, and the crowd dispersed, leaving Beach Head to watch them finish. When they were all finally gathered together again, he said, "I almost forgot. Clutch mentioned that a few of the tanks were dirty from the last mission. Shipwreck, Alpine, and Lady Jaye—you get to wash them this afternoon." He waited to make sure they didn't have any sarcastic comments to offer and dismissed them.

Lady Jaye was relieved that her compatriots had gotten through the entire morning without driving Beach Head over the edge about her, but on the way back inside, Shipwreck sidled up to the drill instructor and started talking to him. "So I can understand not wanting to play favorites, but you went at Lady Jaye pretty hard today. Take a little advice from the Shipster: you got to treat a lady nice."

Beach Head rounded on Shipwreck and yelled, "Drop it, sailor! I'm not about to treat Lady Jaye differently just because we're sleeping together!"

Everyone stopped in their tracks to stare wide-eyed at the drill instructor. Lady Jaye stood in shock, mouth open. Finally she sputtered, "Beach Head! What's wrong with you! We are not sleeping together!" She yelled at the others.

"Oh, come on, Jaye. I think they've figured it out by now. Why don't we just drop the act?" Beach Head replied.

She glared at him, noting the evil smirk that showed through the balaclava. She walked up to him and leaned close, saying in a low voice, "Don't think for a moment that you can win at this game. This isn't over."

Beach Head moved so fast, she didn't even have time to react. He drew up the bottom of his mask and grabbed the back of her neck. He pressed his lips to hers for a moment in a kiss. Hidden by the sound of the others' cheering and applause, he said, "No, it's not over. I believe the score is tied one to one." He turned and walked away, leaving her standing there, speechless.


	6. Pet Names

As soon as Beach Head walked away, Ace rounded on her and said, "What the Hell? I thought you were just pressing Beach's buttons making everyone think you're an item, but that was quite a little show." The other Joes simply continued on their way, looking shocked and amused at the same time.

"He's trying to turn the tables," she gowled. "Too bad he's up against me. I'll make him regret the day he thought he could out-act me."

"Uh huh. So you're going to escalate this? And how will Flint feel about that?"

Lady Jaye turned to the pilot. "Oh, crap. Good point. I can't take this farther without him getting royally pissed off." She walked slowly, thinking, Ace matching her pace.

After a while Ace asked, "So, you really are with Flint?" A note of regret tinged his voice.

"Yes," she replied, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye. "Does that bother you?"

He looked over at her. "I thought you said a long time ago you'd never get involved with anyone on the team."

So that was it. Was he jealous? "Ace, I didn't exactly plan for this to happen. One day Flint and I were good friends who worked well together and then…" she shrugged. "It just hit me out of the blue. We were on a mission, and Flint disappeared for a while… I didn't know where he was, and I realized I was worrying about him more than I would for just a friend." She blushed as she continued. "When he came back to camp, I, ah, overreacted a bit and—I kissed him." She admitted.

Ace laughed. "Man, he must have been floored."

"He was a bit taken aback," she replied with a chuckle. "But Flint is nothing if not suave. I was hoping for the ground to open up and swallow me whole, and he just gave me a big grin and told me he had missed me too. He spent the entire evening teasing me and making suggestive remarks, parading around practically in his underwear. Thankfully the mission was over and we were alone…If anyone else had seen that, I would have asked for a transfer to Alaska."

"But obviously he was interested." Ace commented dryly.

"I think he was giving me time to sort things out, actually," she said slowly. "He told me later it was all he could do not to throw me down on the ground right then and there and show me what that kiss did to him. Can you believe he waited a week to come by my room?"

Ace grunted a noncommittal reply.

"What?" she asked. He didn't reply. "I don't suppose I could get your help with Beach Head?" she said to change the subject.

Ace smiled over at her. "What did you have in mind?" he asked.

Lady Jaye managed to avoid speaking to anyone until after lunch, though heads turned in the hallways to follow her. She showed up in the garage for that day's extra punishment, hoping that Ace had spread the word. He had. Anyone who owned a car or regularly drove a vehicle was there, carrying buckets, sponges, and other car washing equipment. They were all decked out in swimwear, too. Someone had set up a stereo, and a few others had brought along refreshments to share.

Shipwreck swallowed an entire carrot stick when he saw her walk in, but no one made a move to help as he choked and sputtered. Everyone was staring at her. She was wearing her most revealing bikini—white and glossy, it shone against her tanned skin. Lady Jaye gave them all a dazzling smile and walked over to fill the bucket they would use on the first tank.

Clutch whistled when she walked by and Steeler dropped a wrench on his foot. The outfit was definitely the right choice—now if everything else went according to plan, she'd be back on top.

Alpine, Shipwreck and Lady Jaye worked on the first tank, but there was a lot of area to cover. As the other Joes finished up their own vehicles, most of them made their way over and offered to help. That wasn't part of the plan, but certainly welcome. Lady Jaye was a little embarrassed at the attention, but she was determined to get the advantage over Beach Head no matter what it took.

Ace sauntered in after a while and gave her a thumbs up, which meant Beach Head was on the way. The pilot joined them at the second tank, whispering to her, "Nice outfit. If that doesn't throw him for a loop, nothing will." She smiled back at him and continued to scrub at the tank's treads as Ace walked over and picked up a hose. He waited until Shipwreck had sidled up to Lady Jaye and was making another comment about her bikini, then pointed the hose at the sailor, yelling, "I think you could use a cold shower!" The spray took Shipwreck full in the chest, and he let out a yelp of surprise. He picked up a soapy sponge and threw it in Ace's direction.

That was all it took. Soon the water and suds were flying, and a full water war had started. There weren't enough hoses to go around, but others made do with buckets, cups of ice, and anything else to hand.

Beach Head entered the garage, taking in the scene—the food, the music, and the twenty Joes in bathing suits happily drenching each other. Looking out of place in his BDUs, he approached Lady Jaye just as she was squeezing a soapy sponge over Ace's head. In retaliation, Ace picked up his bucket and threw it at her. She ducked, and the entire contents hit Beach Head full in the face. Ace dropped the bucket and ran.

Lady Jaye stifled her laughter at the sight of the drill instructor standing there dripping in his uniform. Some brave soul called out, "Hey! It's a week early for his monthly bath!" She bit her lips. Now was not the time to laugh in his face. Beach Head glared around the room and settled his gaze on her.

His eyes widened as he took in her appearance: the now slightly translucent bikini, the wet hair, the soap running down her arms and legs. He opened his mouth, but no sound came out. She gave him a smile and said seductively, "Hey, Beachie Poo."

Alpine let out an abrupt whoop and clapped his hand over his mouth. Shipwreck chortled and nudged Clutch, who was snickering. Beach Head simply stared and swallowed. Lady Jaye took a step closer and raised an eyebrow at him.

He stepped back, but took a deep breath and managed to regain his composure. He finally replied, "Hey, sugarboobs."

Shipwreck guffawed loudly and asked, "Can I call you that, too?"

Beach Head glared at him and replied, "Hands off my girl."

Lady Jaye had completely missed Flint's entrance through the side door, and whipped around when she heard him speak up. "Excuse me? Did you just call Lady Jaye 'sugarboobs?'"

Beach Head looked over at the Warrant Officer, contemplating his options. Finally he shrugged and replied, "Just a little nickname. She likes it."

Flint turned to Lady Jaye, opening his mouth to comment. He took in the sight of her, and although his jaw remained hanging, he said nothing. His eyes traveled over her bare skin from toes to forehead. Then his eyes narrowed and he glanced at Beach Head. "Let's keep our language out of the sexual harassment danger zone from now on."

"What's wrong, Flint? Jealous?" Ace asked, watching from behind the tread of the tank. Lady Jaye threw him an evil look, but he ignored it. "Come on, Beach. Take off the mask so we can see the hickeys."

It was too much. Beach Head turned to Ace and said threateningly, "I've got four more days of PT with you. I'd watch your mouth if you want to survive." Ace gulped and ducked behind the tread again.

Flint continued to glare at the drill instructor, clenching his fists at his sides. "I would have thought you were a little more professional than I've seen today."

Beach Head was surprised at the vehemence in Flint's voice. He looked from Flint to Lady Jaye and back again. Then it clicked. He'd noticed them together a lot lately. He smiled inwardly and realized he held a trump card. "Well, you know I get a little mushy around Lady Jaye. Especially when she dresses up for me like this." He gestured at her lack of clothing and waggled his eyebrows.

Flint clenched his teeth and shot a look of pure hatred at the other man. Lady Jaye stepped between them and stared down first Flint, then Beach Head. "Stop acting like children," she said.

Beach Head met her stare, saying, "If you give in now, I win."

The other Joes had no idea what was going on, but it was obviously a contest of wills. Lady Jaye smiled sweetly and said, "I think you'd better let us get back to work, little lovebunny. You did tell us to wash the tanks today."

Flint openly goggled at Lady Jaye. "Little lovebunny?" he sputtered.

She winked at him and replied, "Just a nickname. He likes it."

She was happy to see a dawning realization come over his features, and she knew he would trust her for now. He turned to Beach Head and said, "Oh, that's so cute. I've gotta tell that to Duke." Looking over at Lady Jaye, he said, "I need to see you in my office when you're finished here."

Flint walked out, followed shortly after by Beach Head. There was a palpable sigh of relief as the others started to clean up the mess they'd made. They drifted off, the mood of the party broken. The tanks were nearly done, though, and the three miscreants were happy to finally be able to finish and put their own things away.

Alpine and Shipwreck teased her mercilessly the whole time, although she told them that if either one of them called her 'sugarboobs' they wouldn't live to see the next sunrise.

Lady Jaye was the last to leave, and as she turned out the lights, she saw Beach Head approaching. She eyed him warily and waited for him to speak.

"This is getting ridiculous," he began. "I've got a deal for you."

"Go on," she said.

"If Duke legitimately lets you out of the extra PT with me by the third sparring match, I'll admit to everyone that this whole thing was a joke."

"And if I don't?"

"I get to tell everyone I dumped you."

She considered his offer. "That's almost a month away. What happens in the meantime?"

"I promise not to call you sugarboobs if you promise not to call me little lovebunny."

"And you don't ever kiss me again," she added.

He smirked. "Not unless you want me to."

She nodded. "Deal."


	7. TruceSort of

Lady Jaye didn't change before heading to Flint's office. She hoped to keep him distracted and off-guard. He must not have heard about Beach Head's display of affection that morning, or he would have been much angrier in the motor pool. He had thought the whole thing was pretty funny, but hearing about the kiss would likely take the humor right out of the situation.

She heard Duke's voice from the open doorway as she neared the office. "Little lovebunny! Oh, jeez. I don't think I wanted to know that. Man am I ever gonna tease him about that." There was a pause. "I just can't picture the two of him together. But after he kissed her this morning—"

"He WHAT?" Flint interrupted.

Duke laughed. "Yeah, on the way back from the obstacle course, right in front of everyone."

Lady Jaye paused outside of the door and peeked inside. Duke seemed oblivious to the scowl on Flint's face, which he turned on her when he saw her standing there. She swallowed and said, "Flint, you needed to see me?"

Duke turned around, the amusement leaving his face as he noticed her looking into the room. "Hey, tell your boyfriend that I may have said the regs don't apply to us, but he doesn't have to rub it in our faces."

Lady Jaye stepped through the doorway, forgetting about her outfit in the face of Flint's anger. Duke goggled at her and said, "Of course, if you go around dressed like that it's no wonder he couldn't help himself."

"Duke, I told you there's nothing going on with me and Beach Head. He's just trying to make my life miserable by making everyone else think there is."

Duke shook his head, grinning. "Uh huh. I bet that if Flint had tried that you would have decked him." He headed out the door calling, "See ya later, sugarboobs."

Lady Jaye glared after his retreating figure. She was reminded of Flint's presence when he cleared his throat to get her attention. "He kissed you?"

Turning to face him again, she replied, "You told Duke about 'sugarboobs?'"

Flint shrugged. "It _was_ funny." He was eyeing her again, she noticed.

She shut the door behind her and stepped closer. "Well I certainly didn't kiss _him_. If it makes you feel any better, he did it just to make me mad, not because he got off on it."

His eyes narrowed. "So you decided to show up later in that?" he asked, gesturing at the bikini.

"Flint, I 'm sorry. I was just trying to mess with his head. It's become a mental contest on top of the physical one…and I want to win both."

"You're stubborn, arent' you?" he asked with a small smile.

She grinned back. "I thought you knew that already." She stepped into his arms and felt his immediate response to her nearness. "You know you're the only one that I want," she whispered.

He bent down to kiss her. "Are you just getting back at me for wanting to keep our relationship secret? I can't exactly run around telling everyone the truth now."

She looked into his eyes and smiled. "I've got it all worked out," she told him. _I hope_, she added silently. He raised his eyebrows in question, and she continued, "Trust me for a little longer?"

"I trust you," he whispered, kissing her again. "Is the door locked?" he asked, reaching for the tie on the bikini top.

* * *

The next few days of punishment PT flew by in a flurry of aching muscles and bruises. Lady Jaye kept up her training with Snake Eyes, though, despite the added stress on her body. Things were progressing well—she even managed to soundly thump Alpine in a sparring match, although Beach Head didn't see that as much of an accomplishment. She even found herself holding back a little, not wanting to give away her progress to Beach Head before she fought against him.

They had both settled down on the comments and teasing; not that the others had, of course. They had to endure endless chatter from their teammates, most of whom had taken to calling the drill instructor "little lovebunny" when they thought they could get away with it.

The PT was no worse than it had been, but one memorable morning the six Joes had been running the obstacle course, and were nearing the finish line when several of their teammates swarmed the field, chasing after them. Anyone unfortunate enough to be caught had been promptly tackled, carried back to the mud pit, and dumped in. Beach Head stood and watched it all with a smug smile, telling Lady Jaye and the others that they had to start again from the pit every time they were thrown in. Flint, Clutch, Duke, Roadblock, Wet Suit, and Bazooka were obviously enjoying themselves, even though it took three of them to carry Leatherneck, screaming in protest, back to the middle of the course.

Lady Jaye nearly made it to the finish line when they were busy with the marine, but Flint tackled her just shy of the end. He picked her up and threw her over his shoulder, heading back to the pit. She squirmed and pummled his back, but he only laughed and held on tighter. "Sorry," he chortled, "But when Beach Head asked for our help, I couldn't say no." With that, he flung her into the mud and took off to chase after someone else.

She missed movie night and the weekly poker game to train with Snake Eyes, but there was no way she was going to slack off now. She had too much riding on this. He was willing to spend more time with her, and she was grateful. She wanted very badly to beat Beach Head during the first match.

Beach Head ended the last day of their PT by having them run for the first three hours. Whoever logged the most miles in that time would be the only one who didn't have to spend the last two hours running the obstacle course. Not only that, but the winner would get to yield the paintball gun. Lady Jaye had the advantage on that one—she easily outdistanced the others, claiming the gun and watching as her friends started the course. She thought about going easy on them, but after three days of taunts she was ready for a little revenge.

Beach Head approved of her eagerness, although his expression didn't change. He was surprised to see this side of her, watching her laugh gleefully as she used up an entire case of paintballs on the other Joes. He didn't even mind when she imitated his voice, yelling insults and mimicking a few of his favorite phrases. And she was a good shot, hitting her mark most of the time, even making Shipwreck dance as the pellets flew at his feet. She knocked everyone off the high beam, although she had to resort to coming dangerously close to Leatherneck's privates to make him fall off. The marine cupped his hands protectively over himself, and the next shot took him right in the shoulder. He overbalanced and fell, and Lady Jaye let out a whoop of triumph. She forgot herself for a moment and smiled hugely at the drill instructor, saying, "Okay, Beach Head. Now I know why you love your job." He smiled back and they walked alongside of the others as they continued the course. Beach Head pointed out some good angles that he had discovered, and they took delight in watching their teammates try to avoid the fire.

Everyone grumbled a bit when they finally finished the course for the last time, but for the most part they were so happy to be done with the punishment they didn't take it out on her. Most of them would have done the same in her position, anyway.

That night Lady Jaye thought about her meeting with Beach Head in the morning. She only had to be with him for two hours, but she wasn't sure what to expect. She snuggled closer to Flint and fell asleep.

Arriving in the gym promptly at six, she was surprised to see Snake Eyes waiting for her. He told her that Beach Head would be there shortly, but he had asked for Snake Eye's help in working with her. She stared for a moment, nonplussed. She had thought that Beach Head's attitude toward her revolved around a need to dominate someone he didn't like, but his concern must be genuine if he bent enough to ask someone to help him. Could he really be interested in her welfare rather than just being on a power trip?

She shook the thoughts from her head and faced Snake Eyes across the mat. They continued from where they had left off the night before, working on blocks and counter throws. Beach Head came in a while later and stood off to the side, watching. He nodded his approval even though they were working slowly, letting her get the feel of the movements.

when the first hour was up, Beach Head thanked Snake Eyes and gestured Lady Jaye to the center of the mat. She faced him, watching for signs that he was about to attack her, but he only stared at her. Finally he said, "I'm not going to spar against you until our match in a week. Every mornign you'll get an hour of working with Snake Eyes and an hour to practice against someone else. I won't even watch most of the time."

She nodded and opened her mouth, but before she could reply, he turned to leave and said, "Don't let anyone say I wasn't completely fair about this."

Lady Jaye looked up as Scarlett walked into the gym. Her friend smiled and said, "I hear you need a sparring partner for an hour."


	8. Stacking the Odds

To Lady Jaye's surprise, Scarlett didn't engage her in hand to hand combat. Instead she spent the hour showing her Beach Head's fighting style—how he threw his punches, when he tended to move in for a throw, his strengths and weaknesses. When asked why she would do that, Scarlett replied, "Hey, someone needs to take him down a notch. I mean, the man's you're boyfriend and he's still acting like a jerk. I think he's picking on you just so the others don't think he's playing favorites. I can think of at least ten Joes you could take down, and they don't have to go to extra training."

Lady Jaye laughed. "Only ten? Thanks a lot. And for the record, he's still not my boyfriend."

Scarlett smiled. "Yeah, whatever. If it makes you feel any better, I can't think of anyone who could beat you at Trivial Pursuit."

"Oh, yeah, that really stokes my ego," she replied with a wry grin. "Nothing like challenging Cobra Commander to a game of TP for ownership of the world. So, technically, isn't this cheating? I mean, if you're only showing me how to beat Beach Head in a fight…"

"Don't call it cheating, call it stacking the odds," Scarlett said.

"Oh, don't tell me you entered Ace's betting pool?"

"Mmmm… I might have."

"Are you going to tell me what you bet on?"

"Nope."

Lady Jaye looked at her out of the corner of her eye. "And what are the odds right now, anyway?"

Scarlett rolled her eyes. "Well, finding out about you two totally threw it all off… And I really shouldn't tell you anyway."

"Fine," Lady Jaye sighed. "Let's get back to work."

Over the next few days, Lady Jaye was in the gym more than she had been during her punishment PT. If she couldn't make a good show against Beach Head, she'd never live it down. She didn't expect to beat him outright, but she thought she'd made a lot of progress toward being able to give him a run for his money.

That night at dinner, Beach Head actually sat next to her at a table in the back of the cafeteria. She eyed him warily, but he simply gave her a smug smile and ate his dinner. Her other tablemates snickered and nudged each other, but she couldn't quite make out the whispered comments.

The drill instructor took a plate from his tray and set it down in front of her. "I noticed you didn't take any desert. I keep telling you you're not fat… go ahead and eat it."

Her mouth dropped open and she nearly shoved the cake in his face. Instead she smiled and replied, "That's a good idea—I don't think you need any more sweets." She reached over and patted his stomach.

She heard Flint give a small snort of laughter, and Duke shook his head, smiling.

"Cut it out, you two—I'm trying to eat," Scarlett reprimanded.

"Ready for your first match in two days?" Beach Head asked her with a smug grin.

"Oh, I'm looking forward to it." She pinched his cheek and ate his slice of cake, even though she didn't really want it. She felt a small flutter of nervous anticipation in her stomach. She wasn't sure she was ready to face him in a fight, despite the hours and hours she had spent preparing for just that. Scarlett and Snake Eyes had been more than helpful, but would it be enough?

Lady Jaye finished her meal, and Flint walked with her to turn in their trays. They went to her quarters, where she collapsed on the couch. Flint sat next to her, playing with her hair. "You know," he said, "I still feel kind of guilty about this. And I've been too busy to even help you train. There's still a little time if you want to hit the gym...I've sparred against Beach Head enough that I know his style."

She put her arms around him and answered, "It's okay. I've been working on it." She nudged him in the ribs and smiled. "Besides, wouldn't that be cheating?" She wasn't about to disclose her practice sessions with Scarlett or Snake Eyes, and she admitted guiltily to herself that she didn't want the others to know how seriously she'd taken Beach Head's reprimand.

They spent a quiet few hours simply talking—well, mostly talking—before she had to leave to practice again with Snake Eyes. She declined Flint's offer to accompany her to "lift weights" and headed for the gym.

Snake Eyes was setting out a long pole on the center of the mat. Lady Jaye knew that she and Beach Head would only be using padded gloves, so it made her curious. "What's that for?" she asked him.

He signed, 'That's for me. I'm going to test your balance.' He told her to begin the usual block, punch, and kick exercises, and she watched him warily when he picked up the pole. Even though she saw it coming, she barely managed to jump out of the way as he swung it at her knees. He admonished her for not finishing the punch and started in on her again. By the time their first hour was up, she had ducked, rolled, and jumped across the entire length of the mat, feeling like Jackie Chan in his pre-Hollywood days.

Snake Eyes gave her rare praise, insisting that she had made excellent progress. He stopped the physical work out after that and sat down with her on the mat. He told her to spend her extra time on the last day going through the upcoming fight in her head, playing it like a movie until she could see every move she made. He told her that she would be less surprised and more likely to be confident of her own moves during the real fight.

It sounded plausible, and thanks to Scarlett, she had a pretty good idea of how Beach Head would fight. She also had a few inside tips on his weaknesses…but Scarlett had said she was keeping the best for last.

Feeling her nervousness increase despite her apparent readiness, Lady Jaye found Flint in his quarters and spent the evening trying not to think about the upcoming fight at all. He did a wonderful job of taking her mind off of it, and she fell into slumber feeling rested and at ease.

Not that she woke up that way. Lady Jaye slid out of bed early, making sure not to wake Flint. She breathed deeply and headed for the pool to take a few leisurely laps to calm down. Tomorrow would be the first match, and although she technically had three tries to win Duke's approval—or at least to win the bet with Beach Head—she knew that surprise was her best ally. Once Beach Head knew how hard she had been training and discovered her new skills and knowledge, she was sure she would lose the advantage it gave her.

The pool was deserted so early in the morning, and she spent an hour swimming, working the last of the kinks out of her shoulders and legs. She also worked on envisioning the fight, but that just made her feel tense all over again.

She showered and headed to the gym for her last practice with Snake Eyes and Scarlett. There would be no extra training that night; she needed to be able to rest and relax before facing the drill sergeant.

Snake Eyes spent the hour running her through shortened versions of their previous exercises, concentrating on balance and footwork. She did feel stronger and more confident, but wasn't sure that two short weeks could improve her enough to make a difference.

When they were done, she told her instructor, "Snake Eyes, I owe you big time for this. Thank you so much. If I manage to hold my own against Beach Head tomorrow, it will be because of you."

He looked around to make sure that no one could see him. 'Kick his ass,' he signed with a grin. He gave her a thumbs up and walked from the room, passing Scarlett on the way out.

The redhead smiled and asked, "Well, are you ready for tomorrow?"

Lady Jaye sighed. "No. But I've made progress. I just hope I don't embarrass myself."

Scarlett smiled enigmatically. "Oh, I don't think it's you who needs to worry about being embarrassed." She ignored Lady Jaye's quizzical look, and turned to the mats.

"Before we start working today, I'm going to tell you one last secret that might help you against Beach Head." They sat on the mats, and Scarlett leaned forward to whisper, "About a year ago, Beach Head got kicked really hard in the, uh, privates." She stifled a giggle. "Since then he's been really protective of that area. I guarantee if you try to kick him in the crotch, he'll drop all other defenses."

Lady Jaye laughed. "How do you know that?"

"I, um, was there when it happened."

"Wow. You kicked him in the jewels?"

Scarlett blushed. "It was an accident, I swear. He totally should have gotten that block up in time. Trust me, it'll work. I can see him cringe whenever we're partnered for sparring."

Lady Jaye shook her head. "I don't know… that might not be considered fair play."

Scarlett grinned. "I talked to Duke about the rules. Since Beach Head insists that you need to prove that you can fight Cobra, he agreed that the match should be as realistic as possible. And kicking a Cobra soldier in the groin is certainly realistic. So, basically, there are going to be no rules."

Lady Jaye considered that for a moment. "That means he's going to fight dirty…"

Scarlett stood and pulled her up. "Yep. So let's practice already."

By lunch Lady Jaye's mind was in a whirlwind. She felt like she had too much information to process before the next day. She hoped that all of her friends' hard work wouldn't abandon her when she stood in the ring tomorrow. She sighed and grabbed her tray, sitting down with Cover Girl and Shipwreck.

The sailor grinned at her and said, "Hey, doll. Ready for round one tomorrow?"

She gave him a smile, remembering that Shipwreck had bet that her extra PT would last two months before she lost it and went postal on Beach Head outside of the ring. "Oh, sure. No sweat. He's not that tough."

Cover Girl giggled. "He can't fight you seriously if he wants any action later. I think he'll go easy on you."

"He'd better not!" Shipwreck exclaimed. "That would throw off the whole pool—I mean," he shot a quick glance at Lady Jaye. "Uh, forget I said that."

"Only if you tell me what the odds are."

Looking glum, he replied, "Okay, but don't let on that I told you. Odds of you finishing off your PT tomorrow are currently at twelve to one against."

She raised her eyebrows. "And the odds of me being stuck with him for another two months?"

"Only two to one," he answered sheepishly. "But if it makes you feel any better, odds of you being in PT for four months are up to twenty to one."

"Only because everyone thinks you will have strangled each other by then," Cover Girl put in. "Now, the odds on your relationship surviving this are eight to one against."

Lady Jaye shook her head. "Did anyone bet _for_ me tomorrow?"

Cover Girl shrugged. "Only Ace knows."

"Speak of the devil…" Shipwreck said. "Don't tell him I told you, okay?"

Ace sat down at their table and gave everyone a smile. "Well, Jaye, feeling lucky?"

"Luck will have nothing to do with it," she replied.

"Right. Little lovebunny isn't going to go easy on you, you know."

She smiled. "I may have a few tricks up my sleeve."

Before long, their table was filled to overflowing with Joes wanting to check in on her. It seemed like a lot of people must have entered Ace's betting pool. She wondered if any of them were on her side. Well. She'd find out tomorrow.


	9. The Match

Desptite Flint's attempts at making her relax that night, Lady Jaye had a hard time falling asleep. She tossed, restless, her mind focused on the next morning's fight. Some time in the middle of the night she finally fell into a fitful doze. The alarm awoke her with a start, and she nearly rolled out of bed at the loud buzzer.

Flint gave her one last kiss and held her for a moment. "You'll do fine. Don't get worked up over this. It's not really that big of a deal."

She returned his smile. "I know, but I'm sick of having to prove myself to him. If I can do well enough today, maybe he'll leave me alone."

He shook his head. "Or he'll never let you live it down. Just do your best." He kissed her forehead and they rose to dress. Lady Jaye was sure to wear her lightest and most comfortable sweats. She took a few calming breaths, and they headed to breakfast.

Everyone stared at her when they walked in. She felt like there was a spotlight on her as she took her food and sat down. Cover Girl and Scarlett joined them immediately at the table. "Just so you know," Cover Girl told her, "We're rooting for you."

Lady Jaye rolled her eyes. "I would hope so. You're just lucky it's not going to be you out there today."

"Am I ever," she replied with a big smile. "Being beaten senseless by Beach Head is not my idea of fun. But, you know, whatever works for you."

Scarlett checked her watch. "Okay, you've got an hour. What are you going to do while you wait?

"Any suggestions?" Lady Jaye asked hopefully.

"Well, taking a booster shot of steroids is out of the question… you should probably go to the gym early and limber up."

Lady Jaye nodded and stood. "Good idea. Flint, care to join me?"

"I've got a little paperwork to do. But I'll be there a few minutes before you start. I promise." He gave her hand a squeeze and took their trays back to the counter.

Scarlett watched him leave with a considering look. "You'd better watch it or Beach Head is going to get jealous," she told her friend with a laugh.

Lady Jaye shook her head and left.

The gym was eerily silent, although someone had had the foresight to place several chairs around a central mat. The stereo was also set up, and she checked to see what CD was in the system. She couldn't help but laugh when she saw that it was the soundtrack to "Mortal Combat."

She stretched and did a few jumping jacks, then automatically went into the series of moves Snake Eyes had had her practice over and over again. She felt almost calm by the time the other Joes started to trickle in to find their seats.

Her eyes narrowed as she noticed that most of them were carrying hand made signs and banners, though they kept them hidden from her view. Scarlett and Cover Girl came in, too, and she saw that they were wearing matching t-shirts. Lady Jaye walked closer to see them and burst into laughter. Across the front the shirts read: "Friends Don't Let Friends Date Beach Head." They smiled in unison and turned around. The backs of the shirts read: "Flint and Lady Jaye 4Ever."

Lady Jaye smiled and leaned in to whisper, "How did you figure that out?"

Scarlett smiled coyly. "Oh, please. You and Beach Head?"

"Yeah, we didn't believe it for a second," Cover Girl added. "Besides, we live right down the hall—don't you think we've noticed who comes in and out of your room?"

Lady Jaye blushed a little and told them, "I'm glad you know. Beach Head and I have a little side bet going about who gets to reveal what truth about our pretend relationship. And let's just say I really really hope I win today."

The girls laughed and wished her luck, turning to find seats in the rapidly filling room. Lady Jaye paced nervously for a few minutes, but finally Flint arrived. He walked over and put his hand on her shoulder. "Ready?" he asked.

She took a deep breath. "I think so. The crowd makes me a little nervous, though."

"You've sparred in front of all of us at one time or another. Don't think about it."

Lady Jaye nodded. "Thanks for the support, anyway. Wish me luck."

He leaned down and gave her a quick kiss. "Good luck," he smiled. Cover Girl and Scarlett hooted their approval, and the other Joes whistled and shouted.

"You trying to make Beach Head mad?" Shipwreck yelled. "Don't influence the results!"

"Yeah!" Alpine added. "Distracting Lady Jaye isn't fair either!"

He shook his head and gave her one last smile. He sat next to Duke, who had saved him a seat in the front row. Duke handed him some papers, and he placed them under his chair. Lady Jaye had no time to wonder, because Beach Head finally walked in. He looked calm and arrogant. He removed his outer shirt, leaving just a plain white t-shirt with his BDU pants to fight in. He also took off his balaclava, which surprised her. He walked to the mat, and Duke stood to give instructions.

"Okay, I realize everyone is really worked up about this, but let's keep from overdoing it. No punch, kick, or hold is against the rules, but don't fight to do permanent damage. Just take it easy on each other, please. Lifeline is just outside, but I'd rather not have to call him in here. I need each of you able to do your jobs after this." He handed them each their gloves and padded footwear. "I've decided on four rounds of ten minutes each."

Duke stepped back toward his chair, but before he could blow the whistle, Shipwreck and Alpine held up the banner they had carried in. On it was a badly drawn stick figure woman who was very well endowed. The banner read: "Go Sugarboobs!" Beach Head glowered at them, then turned to look as Scarlett and Cover Girl cheered, "Go, Lady Jaye!" He saw their shirts and his eyes narrowed even more.

All around the room, other signs and banners were being held up as everyone declared their sides. Lady Jaye smiled as she realized that, bet or no, most of the team was pulling for her. Beach Head noticed it too, and looked at her out of the corner of his eye. He didn't really care how popular he was with his teammates, but he wished that someone other than Leatherneck was cheering for him. Even Snake Eyes was holding up a sign that said, "Go LJ!" He growled to himself. He didn't care.

The two contestants faced each other as someone in the back cued up the stereo. The first beats of "Mortal Combat" started as Duke began the match.

Neither of them moved for a moment. They stood, assessing each others' readiness. Beach Head lunged suddenly and drove a fist toward Lady Jaye's stomach. She stepped to the side and felt his fist brush the front of her shirt. She countered with a jab to his elbow while his arm was extended, but he bent with the blow and tried to kick her instead. Her block got up just in time, and she was able to throw another punch, this time at his head.

He moved out of the way and came in for another kick. Instead of blocking, Lady Jaye stepped closer and brought a stiff arm across the front of his chest. She leaned into it, and Beach Head fell backwards and rolled upright again immediately. Lady Jaye quickly shook off her shock at getting in the first good blow and went into a defensive crouch. She dimly heard cheering in the background. Beach Head came at her with a series of punches, the last of which hit her solidly in the hip. Her counter blows were blocked, but they stopped his attack at least.

Thanks to Scarlett's training, Lady Jaye was expecting the next kick, and was already moving under it even as he started. He caught on to the move, though, and aborted the kick, turning it into a long step forward instead. He moved fast and threw his weight against her, catching her in the shoulder and knocking her down. She rolled to the side and just missed the fist aimed at her sternum. This time the crowd booed, and Beach Head scowled. Lady Jaye leapt upright and brought an elbow toward Beach Head's jaw, but he ducked and swept at her feet with his arm. She fell again, but he backed up a step and stood, giving her time to do the same. The crowd was screaming, but she blocked it out.

They circled and feinted for a minute, and Beach Head started with the same tactic as before, throwing another punch at her stomach. She moved back and caught his arm in her hands, grabbing his wrist and arm, bending it at the joint. She pushed back on his elbow so that it was lifted above his shoulder and shoved. He fell on his back, unable to keep his balance. Someone whistled and yelled, "Go, sugarboobs!"

Duke blew the whistle and Lady Jaye stepped back, suddenly aware that she was out of breath. She heard Flint yell from the front row and turned to him. He held up a sign that said: "Lady Jaye 287 Beach Head 1." He also had a huge grin on his face, and she found herself smiling in return.

She knew that Beach Head would alter his defense now, and that she had to switch tactics. The first round she had surprise on her side, but now he would be watching for those moves, and she doubted they'd work again. She'd done well, even if she hadn't definitively won. Three more rounds to go.

Lady Jaye could tell right away that she had lost her advantage. Beach Head stalked her warily, waiting for an opportunity. She made the first move this time, aiming a kick at his midsection. He blocked it easily and punched; she swung an arm up to block and his other arm came around her side and hit her right in the kidney. She lurched forward as he turned to follow, and just managed to duck under the next two punches. She grabbed his ankles and lifted with her shoulders at his knees, and he rolled over her back and onto the mat.

They recovered at the same time and squared off again. Beach Head threw a series of punches, and Lady Jaye backed in a circle, not letting them land. She counter punched, and he blocked hard enough to bruise her forearms. She guessed he would switch to kicks next and was already stepping forward when his leg came up. His thigh met her side as she grabbed the front of his shirt and swiveled to the side. He fell to the mat but simply kicked up from a prone position, catching her in the thigh. She stepped back as he rose, swinging up at her stomach.

She admitted she wasn't much better at blocking than she had been before, and that throws were her strongest point. Of course, with Beach Head landing on the fairly soft mats, it wasn't doing any damage. Lady Jaye decided it was time to switch to more punches of her own. She no longer stepped back from his blows, but blocked and counter punched with a fury. Unfortunately that turned the tide back in his favor, as it meant strength mattered again. He quickly saw that she was struggling, and increased his pace.

By the time Duke signaled the end of round two, Beach Head had scored several hits, and Lady Jaye was wincing at the pain in a solid ring around her ribs. She had landed a few blows herself, though, and was pleased to see him rubbing his shoulder where she had gotten in a particularly good one.

She looked over to Flint. His sign now read "Lady Jaye 312 Beach Head 67." She shook her head at him but gave him a wink. She saw that Ace was walking around the room, marking things down on a clipboard, and wondered if the odds had changed much.

Scarlett waved to get her attention, and when she looked over, the redhead said in sign language, "Don't forget the secret move." Lady Jaye nodded. She hadn't forgotten, but Beach Head hadn't started to fight dirty yet, and she didn't want to be the one to start. Unless she had no choice.

She finished her water and worked her shoulders, ready for round three.


	10. Winners and Losers

Everyone settled back into their chairs as Duke blew the whistle to start round three. Lady Jaye moved in immediately, but Beach Head was prepared for an attempted throw. He bent down and sprang up, driving his shoulder into her sternum. Breathless, she couldn't block the knee that followed after. She gasped and stepped back, but Beach Head followed. He grabbed the front of her shirt as she straightened, but she fell backwards, bringing up a leg in between them. She threw him over her head, and he rolled, giving her enough time to catch her breath.

Beach Head continued his offense, not letting her get close enough for another throw. It went downhill for her from there, especially since he really wasn't pulling his punches. She was getting tired, and could only hope that he was, too. She could tell that the continual booing every time he landed a blow was getting on his nerves. His face showed his anger, and his punches began to get a little faster and harder. Lady Jaye had a difficult time keeping up with them, and every throw was blocked. If she hadn't become familiar with his fighting style after all of the training, she would have gone down long since.

The end of the round was a relief. Lady Jaye glanced at Flint's unofficial score card; it now read "Lady Jaye 400, Beach Head 309." Flint shrugged at her mock pout and called, "One more round…don't give it up yet."

It was time to use Scarlett's information. She almost hated to do it, but she caught Beach Head's smug expression, and her reticence disappeared.

They faced each other for the last round. Lady Jaye thought that if she could get a few last good throws in, Duke might judge in her favor. She refused to entertain the idea that she would have to do this again in a week if he didn't. And that if in three weeks Duke hadn't pulled her from the extra PT that Beach Head would be able to tell everyone that he dumped her. She was sure he would add some interesting and embarrassing stories to explain why… and she wouldn't be able to deny any of them, no matter how ludicrous, thanks to the bet.

She gritted her teeth and sprang forward at the whistle. She didn't try a throw, though, which was what Beach Head would expect. Instead she brought her elbow up to his chin, and he threw his head back just in time to lessen the blow. She barely clipped his jaw, and he reacted by bringing up his foot and slamming it into her instep. Lady Jaye stumbled back, limping a little. She heard Shipwreck call, "Hey! That was dirty! Get 'im, Jaye!"

She agreed with the sentiment. She had about eight minutes to give a good show. She stepped close again, ignoring the fist she took in the arm, bringing her knee up toward his groin. She was pleased to see the surprised look on his face, along with a brief flash of fear. Lady Jaye would have missed it if she hadn't been watching for it. Beach Head stepped back, but it was still a near miss.

He watched her warily, crouching protectively in defense. She gave him an evil smile and moved in again. He circled around her, not letting her get close. Duke finally yelled, "Quit stalling, Beach Head!" The drill instructor glared at him, but went in for another attack. Lady Jaye blocked and drove a fist down hard; she didn't really want to hit him there, but he had to think she would. Beach Head lifted his leg and turned sideways, which was all she needed. She put a foot behind his other leg and drove her shoulder into his chest. He fell back with a thud.

The other Joes surged to their feet with a loud cheer. She let Beach Head stand, and rushed in. He immediately lowered his hands, assuming she would continue the focus of her attack, but she went straight for the jaw. His eyes widened, but it was too late. Her glove hit him squarely, driving him back a step on the mat. He shook his head, raising a hand to hit back, and she dropped her gaze pointedly to his belt buckle. He froze, noticing where she was looking, and dropped his hands back down.

The corner of her mouth lifted in a triumphant grin, and she punched him as hard as she could in the center of his chest. He growled and came in to return the attack, but she could tell he was winded. She was able to block and even managed a counter kick that landed on his stomach. They went all out for the last few minutes of the round, but with Beach Head constantly on guard for an attack below the belt, it was a fairly even trade.

Beach Head finally got behind her and grabbed her around the arms and chest. Lady Jaye figured he planned on holding her until Duke blew the whistle, and she decided to try one last tactic. Snake Eyes had shown her specifically how to counter this move since Ace had done the same thing to her in one of their first matches. Lady Jaye wrapped her legs around Beach Head's so that her feet rested at the back of his knees. She forcefully straightened her legs and threw her weight back as hard as she could. Beach Head's legs flew out from underneath him and she landed hard on top of him on the mat. She felt his breath leave him in a rush and she rolled free, coming to her feet and standing over him. He glared up at her, but didn't move.

Finally he stood, but neither of them threw a punch or a kick. Beach Head looked her over and nodded. She met his gaze and nodded back. They both understood that he wouldn't give her a hard time any more—well, no more than he did any one else.

Duke ended the round and the match. The cheers subsided as Duke stood and walked to the mat. He checked Flint's sheet and said, "Okay, the unofficial score seems to be 764 to 398 in Lady Jaye's favor." He raised his hand to quiet the laughter, and turned to Beach Head. "I know you have the team's best interest at heart… but I don't see any reason to keep Lady Jaye in PT any longer."

There were moans from around the room. Everyone may have been rooting for her, but that didn't mean that they wanted to lose their bets. Ace was checking his clipboard as Beach Head reached out a hand toward Lady Jaye. Surprised, she took it, and they shook hands. "I knew having you work out with Snake Eyes and Scarlett would help," he told her quietly, "But I'm glad to see those extra sessions with Snakes paid off, too."

Lady Jaye's mouth dropped open in shock. "You knew about it?"

He smiled. "Sure. And you're a better fighter now, aren't you? I just figured you needed the right motivation."

"What?" she sputtered. "You planned this? You knew I'd spend hours training just to get out of your stupid PT?"

He raised his eyebrows. "Would you have trained otherwise?"

She shrugged. "Probably not…" Her eyes narrowed slightly. "Did you just outmaneuver me?"

Beach Head laughed. "Yep. I'm no Psyche Out, but over the years I've learned a lot about what motivates people. For a while there I felt like I was running into a brick wall with you and your smart mouth. But physical intimidation isn't the only way I operate. I just had to use my head—and your stubbornness."

Lady Jaye gave a small chuckle. "I admit I'm impressed. I promise to keep up the training if you promise not to go out of your way to make my life miserable."

"That's all I wanted in the first place," he answered. He turned to leave, but Lady Jaye put a restraining hand on his shoulder. "I think you're forgetting about our little side bet…"

He looked at her and sighed. "Fine. Let Ace announce the results and then I'll tell everyone."

They waited while Ace finished the computing, and Lady Jaye spent a few minutes receiving slaps on the backs and congratulations from her teammates. Cover Girl told her, "Score another one for the girls. I just hope I'm not the next target…"

Scarlett laughed and replied, "I've got some tips that might help."

Ace walked to the center of the mat and gestured for the music to be cut. He turned to Duke and said, "Hey, could you maybe leave for a few minutes, boss?"

Duke shook his head. "Are you kidding? I want to know who won."

The pilot shrugged and turned to the rest of the Joes. "Okay, folks. Most of you bet that it would last a lot longer than this, which leaves us with one winner for the overall time frame." He sighed and pulled a wad of cash from his pocket. "Unbelievable. At twelve to one odds, six hundred dollars goes to Flint."

Lady Jaye burst into laughter. She gave Flint a huge grin as he came up to collect his winnings. He pocketed the money with a wink in her direction.

Ace continued, "As for the side bets…as the happy couple appears to be, well, happy," he gestured at Beach Head and Lady Jaye, "That makes our winners—"

Beach Head interrupted Ace. "I have an announcement that may change that little outcome."

Ace turned, acting surprised. "Oh, well, if you two are breaking up, that means I have to recalculate—"

"We're not breaking up, because there is no relationship."

Ace grinned. "Care to elaborate?"

Beach Head rolled his eyes. "We were never dating. Ever. That was just a stupid rumor."

"You kissed her!" Alpine yelled. "We saw it!"

"I was just pissing her off. I told her that if she did well enough in the sparring match I would tell everyone the truth." He gave a small shrug. "So I'm telling. End of story."

The others took in this information in silence. Ace looked down at the clipboard and said, "Well, it seems like we still have winners. At ten to one odds that Lady Jaye and Beach Head weren't dating at all, Cover Girl and Scarlett win four hundred dollars." He winced and pulled out more money. The girls took it eagerly and turned to Lady Jaye. "The girls win again."

Scarlett looked in Snake Eye's direction and signed, "Hey, handsome, want to go get dinner?" Lady Jaye caught the exchange, but it went too fast for most of the others to comprehend. She filed away the information with a smile.

Shipwreck sidled up to Lady Jaye and asked, "Hey, that means you're free, right? The Shipster is also free, you know…"

Flint cleared his throat. "She's not free."

Shipwreck's head swiveled around to gape at Flint. "How do you know?"

"Guh," Lady Jaye said. "Figure it out." She walked over to Flint and put her arms around him. She reached up and kissed him thoroughly, much to the amazed amusement of the others as they applauded the performance.

"So, what are you going to do with your winnings?" Lady Jaye asked.

Flint turned to Duke and asked, "I won our bet, right?"

Duke replied grumpily, "Yes. You won the stupid bet. You cheated, but you won."

"I didn't cheat. I just bet you that Lady Jaye would kiss me in front of everyone today. How did I cheat?"

"I thought she was dating Beach Head!" Duke yelled.

"Well, tough," Flint replied with a smile. He looked down at Lady Jaye. "I just won weekend leave for myself and a guest." He waved his wad of cash. "Care to go somewhere romantic?"

She laughed, feeling the sore muscles along her stomach. "As long as it has a hot tub…"


End file.
